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I am a lot of things, wife, sister, friend, and aunt but most of all I am a grieving mother of a lost baby girl taken too soon.  This blog is my way of venting and surviving.  I'm trying to find my way back to funny, sarcastic, and happy but it's quite a journey.

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Changes to come

I have been thinking a lot lately about what will make me happy in my life.  I have begun to read articles on self-improvement and have noticed consistency with posts on happiness.  As far as I can tell these seem to be the things that should help me feel better about myself and get out of the funk I have been in lately.  Of course the obvious solution to my happiness would be to actually get to bring home my next baby.  But, I find it important to improve my sense of self and my mind before I bring another baby into this world.  Here is the list of things that may make me/you feel better and the ways I plan on implementing them into my life and Kevin’s. 

·         Exercise more (At least 10 mins a day) Well, looks like Annie (Our black lab) will be getting longer walks.  While I was out of work I walked Annie all of the time.  We went on long walks and new adventures every day.  Since being at work I haven’t really taken the time to do this.  I need to start again!

·         Sleep more In one of my last posts I talked about how I hate to sleep! How I always need to be doing something.  Well, Maybe that’s where I have been going all wrong? Maybe that’s contributing to the jumbled thoughts in my head all day long.  So, I will put more effort into sleeping more in the days to come. 

·         Move closer to work Well, this is easier said than done.  But, I have been thinking about switching jobs.  It’s time. 

·         Spend time with friends and family Kevin and I have actually been doing pretty good at that lately.  When everything first happened we didn’t want to be around people.  Now, it helps.  We both love fall and Halloween activities so hopefully we can get our friends involved. 

·         Go outside This is true.  Kevin and I need to spend more time outside doing outdoor things.  Taking walks, runs, going on day trips and just breathing in the fresh air.  This weekend I think we will take a nice trip to the zoo.  I love the zoo. 

·         Help others I will do my part to help others by writing my blog.  It helps me and I hope if I get enough followers than more parents of angel babies will feel like they are not alone.  I have also always wanted to volunteer at a soup kitchen.  Today, I’ll find one. 

·         Practice smiling Ehhh….If you walk around smiling for no good reason all the time people will probably think you’re a wacko…Probably even more so if I just sit at my cube smiling at my computer.  This I’ll probably have to try at home.  Who knows maybe I’ll freak out Kevin and that could be fun for a little while J

·         Plan a trip We have always talked about going to Chicago or Washington DC.  This year, I’m going to make it happen. We’ll go. 

·         Meditate Meditating seems a little too hippie dippy for me but, its all about breathing right? So Every day I’ll take 10 mins and just sit and breath ALONE. 

·         Practice gratitude Instead of thinking about all of the bad in my life I am going to appreciate the good.  Give thanks to people that deserve it and get rid of people in my life that don’t.  I have already started to do this. 

Those are the changes I hope to make.  We’ll see about the progress I make and how it makes me feel after I have implemented these changes.  Maybe I’ll start to see a glimpse of myself again if I can start to see a little more happiness. 

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